Okay, the title has nothing to do with what I’m about to write, but when I woke up this morning that’s the first thing I said to Kyle. I don’t think he heard me because he didn’t respond (but then again, he’s pretty good at tuning out some of my mindless banters).
“This can’t be right!”, “I haven’t been this heavy since I was pregnant with Miles”, Wait a minute; I have keys in my pocket”, “What! This thing must be broken”, “Let’s Go y’all I’m ready to go home” You ever have this quiet conversation with yourself? I did.
About three months ago at the NJ Aquarium. While Kyle, Zoë & Miles were over at the stingray tank, ooohing and ahhing I was making a decision that ruined the rest of my day.
At the aquarium, they have this scale that you can step on and “compare your weight with that of a sea animal” How stupid of me, to set myself up for failure. I stepped onto this scale, and I felt like I was on an episode of the biggest looser, my palms are sweaty, my pulse is up, and I’m looking at this contraption watching the numbers go higher and higher. Finally the numbers stop, and I’m confused. A picture appears on the screen. A Shark. I shout “are you kidding me” (a little louder that I intended) I look around, and now I see that there a woman snickering off to my left saying something to her husband. (How rude!) Oh, now I’m heated! I step off the scale, and I see that the computer has printed something out. I snatch it up and skim over everything, and then my eyes lock on the bold Print “YOUR WEIGHT IS EQUAL TO THAT OF A FEMALE NURSE SHARK” I did everything I could to stop myself from screaming. I needed to take a seat.
I don’t like the aquarium any more, and I am not a female nurse shark!
1 comment:
Don't by into that nonsense! Everyone who steps onto that thing is a female nurse shark. The guys in the security room are sitting up there taking bets on whose gonna react the worse! Good stuff though, keep 'em coming!!!
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